Would You Go Out With A Freak?

Samantha Blake
Starting to feel a bit better about things. Had my first night’s sleep last night when I didn’t burn anything, have a nightmare, or go sleepwalking. I feel really good actually. Just got to work on the daytime anxiety now.

James was talking about my friend Susan. He says he fancies her, and I know that she really - really likes him. It got me thinking about boys and stuff. Will they fancy me? I mean, they might at first, but then what if they find out about what I can do?

Will they think I’m a freak?

Who wants to go out with a freak? I can’t imagine having a boyfriend. Just being that close to someone, and kissing and - aaaarrrrggghhh - think about something else.

I’d feel too self conscious all the time. Sometimes I feel like my skin is prickling with heat as it is. I just couldn’t ever relax or be myself with anyone.

There’s no way I’d be able to talk to anyone about this. I know James might see this. Actually, I don’t think he even bothers to read this. I read his stuff though. I want to know how my brother is. Want to make sure he’s ok.

I know Mum and Dad are looking out for me, but sometimes having these powers makes me feel very alone.